Yesterday our friends the Burkes came over and we had a little cookout. The kids splashed about in the pool and dismantled a couple rooms in the house, and a good time was had by all. James cajoled me into trying his "saltine challenge". Ech. Y'know... it's pretty damn hard to eat 6 saltines in 60 seconds. Once I fired down the first one it was clear to me that I wasn't going to make it. James and I played some HALO and another XBOX game and then we settled in for a game of "Wise and Otherwise"...

If you've never played Wise and Otherwise, it's basically like Balderdash. Balderdash is a game where one player reads and spells a word for the other players. Then the other players make up definitions for that word while the person who spelled it writes the real definition. The definitions are all mixed together and randomized and read aloud. Then the players each pick the definition they believe to be the real one. If someone picks your fake definition, you get points. If you pick the right definition you get points. If nobody gets it right, the reader gets points and then play passes to the left so that a new player becomes the reader. It's a lot of fun.

Wise or Otherwise works on the same principle except that the reader reads the first half of an obscure proverb, identifying the culture of origin. Then all players try to come up with an ending for the proverb.

For example a quote might say, "There is an old Spanish saying: Drink wine upon..." How would you choose to end this one? How about "Drink wine upon good news, drink much upon bad."?  The real answer is "Drink wine upon figs."

The game is a lot of fun. Here are some of the proverbs we came up with. Have a look and see if you can pick the correct answers out of each list of four.  You can find the real quotes here.

Wise and Otherwise -- Some of Our Proverbs
# Origin Given Answers
1 Dutch Meal clings to...
  1. a new sack.
  2. he that steals it.
  3. the stone.
  4. the miller's wife.
2 English Much bread grows...
  1. where the baker sows.
  2. much mold.
  3. where grain is spilt.
  4. in a winter night.
3 French Are there not spots...
  1. on a dalmation?
  2. on the sweetest plum?
  3. on the sun?
  4. on the king's face?
4 French Where the hostess is handsome...
  1. the wine is good.
  2. the dinner will be grand!
  3. the hors d'ouevres are gone.
  4. the guests are all men.
5 German Safe over the bridge one laughs at...
  1. the enemy.
  2. is the bridge one cries over.
  3. Saint Nepomuck.
  4. the ford.
6 Irish Meal is finer than grain, ...
  1. but it makes poor ale.
  2. women are finer than men.
  3. but flour is finer.
  4. but grain is finer for brew.
7 Italian Every wind does not...
  1. break the tree.
  2. foretell a storm.
  3. air your laundry.
  4. shake down the nut.
8 Jamaican If you scrape a gourd...
  1. you must eat the seeds.
  2. all you got to show for it is the rind.
  3. you will find a wormhole.
  4. you will have a bowl for your stew.
9 Roman Abstain from...
  1. beans.
  2. those things that are good from you.
  3. celibacy if you would partake of happiness.
  4. the grape and your wisdom will grow.
10 Russian Moans and groans...
  1. come from the least ill.
  2. make a man weak.
  3. won't help.
  4. don't pay the landlord.
11 Sardinian If you return an ass's kicks...
  1. be sure you also return his kisses.
  2. you will soon dwell in the stable.
  3. most of the pain is yours.
  4. you will grow long ears.
12 Scottish A drink is shorter than...
  1. a wedding.
  2. life itself.
  3. a tale.
  4. the barmaid's patience.
13 Scottish He sits very still who has...
  1. a rip in his trousers.
  2. sat on a nettle.
  3. a spear up his arse.
  4. a burr in his buttocks.
14 Spanish The secret in swimming is to know how to...
  1. breathe.
  2. float.
  3. tell a shark from a tuna.
  4. take care of your clothes.
15 Swiss It is possible to talk to cattle if...
  1. one listens.
  2. you have common sense.
  3. you sound like grass.
  4. all you do is moo.

As a parting note, my thanks to my sister Donna, who gave Wise and Otherwise to me as a gift some years ago.