Ever had a song stuck in your head that just wouldn't go away?  You're not alone.  The Germans actually have a word for this phenomenon, they call it 'Ohrwurm' (literally "earworm"), in Portuguese it is called 'chiclete de ouvido', or "ear chewing gum".  Apparently English has no such generally accepted term (though many suggest earworm).  A few weeks ago I had planned to write a blog article about getting songs stuck in your head, but in the end I felt I wouldn't have anything to add to the number of articles out there devoted to the subject.  That all changed a few days ago...

But first, the science.  In 2001 the LA Times published an article on the subject which discussed the 'cognitive itch' theory.  The basic idea is that some tunes are poison ivy to your brain.  They cause a mental itch that can only be scratched by replaying the song in your head.  And of course, as with physical itches, the more you scratch, the worse it gets.

The article goes on to speculate about what sorts of songs tend to be 'sticky'.  How can they be identified?  Like poison ivy's shiny leaves in groups of three, such songs have particular characteristics, according to University of Cincinnati Professor, James Kellaris:

... One possibility is excessive repetitiveness. Although all songs contain repetitious elements, some rely on the technique so heavily that they might cause the brain to echo the pattern automatically, Kellaris suggests. Examples: "Follow the Yellow Brick Road," Queen's "We Will Rock You" and the theme from "Mission: Impossible."

A related factor is musical simplicity. "Children's songs seem more prone to get stuck than complicated material, such as a Bach fugue," Kellaris says. "Perhaps the ease with which a tune can be reconstructed" increases its adhesiveness...

I guess a word to the wise would be if you find yourself listening to a highly repetitive, simplistic song, you'd be well advised to shut it off.  Like diseases, certain tunes can be 'catchy'.  How many of us have found ourselves listening with some sympathy to a friend complain about an annoying song stuck in his or her head, only to find that very same song stuck in our head a few minutes later?  The friend, whom we formerly pitied, now becomes the object of our anger.

Last Friday I found two humorous animations by way of Aces Full of Links which touch on this phenomenon (WARNING: CLICK THESE LINKS AT YOUR OWN RISK):

The first, "Badgerphone" is a rehash of an earlier highly repetitive and annoying animation known simply as "Badger Badger" which I never understood the appeal of.  Badgerphone uses some of the original animation from Badger Badger but has replaced the annoying music with something much catchier.

In fact the music in Badgerphone is so catchy, it inspired the second animation--the violent, foul-mouthed and hilarious "Banana Phone", an animation that details what happens when a truly virulent song terrorizes three roomies.  In this case, the song is passed by physical contact, like a real disease, with disastrous results.

The same music (played at different speeds) is used in both animations.  The original song is indeed called "Bananaphone" and is performed by famed children's songwriter Raffi on the album of the same name.

On its surface the song is simply a very catchy, silly, kid's song with toe-tapping music... but having heard Bananaphone, I find myself haunted by this song like no song has ever haunted me before.  It's been three days now, and I keep catching myself humming and singing this stupid ditty... dammit!

On Saturday night I played the animations for my friend Matt.  The next day he called me and admitted that Bananaphone was stuck in his head.  Typhoid Raffi had struck again... poor guy.

On Mother's Day I visited my folks and told them about the infernally happy song and of course they wanted to see the animations.  Later throughout the day my Mom would start singing the chorus and then stop herself... she was infected.  My wife, who had been successfully resisting the song's diabolical pull all weekend, suddenly began whistling the tune while playing cards with my folks yesterday... another victim.

Remember the movie "The Ring"?  All you had to do was watch a certain videotape, and you would die seven days later?  It's somewhat ironic then that the chorus of Bananaphone repeats the word 'ring' seven times. COINCIDENCE???

I wrote to my friend James (not James Kellaris... James Burke who writes the Aces Full of Links blog) on Friday and called him an "agent of evil" for posting links to those animations.  He confessed that his daughters own the Raffi album in question, and that the song was getting regular airtime in his home.

Apparently James Kellaris, the marketing professor who has studied songs that get stuck in your head, has taken to calling them "earworms" from the original German term (see GuysBlog).  I would like to propose a different term.  I suggest that songs that get stuck in the head be called 'bananaphones' in honor of the stickiest and catchiest song of all time.  It's not a bad term especially considering that it includes the suffix -phone which is used to describe sounds or music.  For example an antiphone is "the response which one side of the choir makes to the other in a chant; alternate chanting or signing."  Then there's homophone... two words that sound alike but are spelled differently such as meet and meat.  There are many others... pyrophone, aerophone, mellophone, and so forth.  I plan to e-mail Professor Kellaris with this suggestion.  My suspicion is that he'd be happier to stick with earworm... but maybe if he just listens to the song...

The thing which makes Bananaphone so devious is that it is so happy and bouncy and filled with silly joy is that it is almost impossible not to get it lodged in your head.  I found it to be so insidious that I rewrote the lyrics for Mr. Burke as "Sataniphone"... a song about a satanic telephone used to summon demons.    Of course, as an atheist, I don't believe in any of that stuff, but it served well as a humorous way to describe just how evil Bananaphone is.

Therefore, I'll close with the Sataniphone parody...

SATANIPHONE
============

Dingalingalinglinglinling!
BOOP BE-DOOPY DOOP!
BOOP BE-DOOPY DOOP!

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring... Sataniphone!
Bing bong bing bong bing bong bing... Sataniphone!

My ears are bleeding,
Guess I'm needing,
For us to sacrifice something... THING!

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring... demoniphone!
Zing bing wing ding fling ting ting... demoniphone!

During Black Masses,
We shake our asses,

Sacrifice!
Is so nice!
Hellular, modular, Necronominodular!

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring... Mephistophone!
Ding ding ding ding ding dong ding... Mammoniphone!

It puts the scream in
Calling a demon...

My Hellular... Satanular phone!

Don't need crosses
Don't need chimes
To call a friend of mine...

Just need a virgin, and black robes,
To have a real good time...

I'll call Azazel, I'll call Moloch,
I'll call Tarterus, have a talk!

I'll place a call to the underworld,
Operator get the Dark King-king-kingaling...

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring... Beelzephone!
BOOP BE-DOOPY DOOP!
Ping pong ping pong ping pong ping... Cthuluphone!

Ring the black order when you're all alone
Invite dark brethren into your home
And summon up a demon or two...

On your Hellular, Satanular phone!!!

Sataniphone... ring ring ring...
Sataniphone... ring ring ring...
Sataniphone... ring ring ring...

Other articles consulted: