"One of the problems I have with the Kerry crowd," somebody said on the radio today, "is that they're not so much 'for Kerry' as they are 'against Bush'."  The fellow went on to describe himself as an undecided voter, leaning to the right, who needed Kerry to articulate what he would do differently or better than George Bush before he would consider voting Kerry.  To a degree I understand the sentiment, if I'm choosing between two things, I like to know the plusses and minuses of each... after all, I already know choice A is not choice B.  Right? ...

Allow me to digress a moment and tell you a little story of a guy named Bob.  Bob is going away on business and he needs to hire someone to watch his house and look after his kids.  Bob only has two people to choose from, Moe and Joe.  So he interviews Moe and Joe and listens carefully to their qualifications.  Each definitely has his own style but they both sound competent.  Eventually he selects Moe, and Joe moves to Botswana to raise turtles.

Bob hands the keys to the house over to Moe and goes on a business trip for 8 weeks.  When he comes home he finds: his dog is missing, his credit card has been charged up to the max on Moe's personal action-figure collection, his kids have been eating McDonald's every night and have been missing school, the house is a pit, the goldfish died because somebody didn't clean the tank, his mortgage payment didn't go out on time and the bank is screaming for its money, Moe's friends Larry and Curly have been coming over every night and throwing parties, Moe's friends have been using foul language and racist hate-speech around his kids, and at least one of them seems to have tried to convert his children to another religion.  In addition, because Moe didn't keep up with the yardwork, the neighbors are all pissed at Bob.  To top it off, Moe apparently kept parking his car on Bob's neighbor's front lawn, and in response the neighbor has filed a lawsuit against Bob.

On Joe's next business trip, 6 months later, he again has two people to pick from--Fred... and Moe.  Now, if Fred is not like... a convicted felon or something, how hard does he need to sell himself on his qualifications?

However let's say Joe goes ahead and does the interviews.  During Fred's interview Fred makes a few minor (harmless) flubs, but comes across as earnest and capable.  He does devote a lot of his time to reminding Bob what a terrible job Moe has done.

Moe's interview is almost surreal.  He refuses to admit that he did anything wrong.  In fact when asked to name one of his mistakes, he can't.  Everything bad that happened is somebody else's fault, covered up, or spun into a good thing.  Though the fish died, his "Clean Tank Initiative" was a "good start".  The altercation and legal battle with the neighbor was essential to the security of Bob's home, and though it has drained Bob's bank account into perpetuity, when it finally is settled, Moe is confident Bob will win.  Of Fred, Moe makes light of his flubs, and plays on Bob's fears, "What's going to happen when those good for nothing neighbors of yours march on the house?  You going to trust Fred?  Or me?  The guy with the AK-47?"

Afterward, does Bob know if he can trust Fred?  No he doesn't.  But he certainly knows who he CAN'T trust.  If Bob were to ask Moe to look after his place again, any of us would think him extremely stupid for doing so.  Many of us as parents have had the experience of having a bad babysitter.  You don't give bad babysitters "second chances"--the job is too important.

Seriously considering Bush for office in 2004 is fucking stupid.  The man has sent our kids to die in a war that has NOTHING to do with fighting terrorism, for reasons which turned out to be false, the economy tanked, hundreds of thousands of jobs were lossed, civil liberties were chewed up, environmental legislation was knocked down and new programs passed given names which make them sound environmentally aware when they are anything but, 90% of our allies (y'know those people we count on for help?) are pissed off at us, education acts are passed but not paid for, we've gone from the largest budget surplus in the history of our nation to the largest deficit in the history of our nation--a debt your kids and mine will have to shoulder, at the same time he gave a big fat 89 billion dollar tax cut to the wealthiest 2% of our population, and so on, and so on, and so on.

Can we trust John Kerry, can we be absolutely certain he won't also make mistakes?  Of course not.  Is that any reason to reelect Bush?  Of course not!  I am confident Kerry would make a better President than Bush.  I can't be 100% sure of course, but I know you don't rehire someone who is demonstrably incompetent.  Period.

Bush should be in Botswana raising turtles.

I implore you to send him packing on election day.  This is not a tough decision, folks.  The choice is obvious.