Unbecoming Levity

Happy Thanksgiving!

Abacquer — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 07:18:00 -0500

Just taking a moment to wish a happy thanksgiving to my friends and anyone else who happens by. I'll be visiting Mom today for a thanksgiving dinner. I don't know how much I'll be able to eat though--exactly seven days ago I had the last of my teeth removed. My mouth is still pretty sore and the new dentures, unfortunately, don't seem to fit well. But I'll muddle through.

Sorry I haven't written much. I just haven't had much to say. Strangely, things in the news that have outraged me haven't given me the urge to write, mostly because it seems to be the same thing every time. (Prop 8's passage for example.)

Hear Hear or Here Here?

Abacquer — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 08:04:00 -0500

So today I found myself agreeing with someone online and went to type "hear hear" but then remembered seeing someone else type "here here" a couple days earlier.

I was pretty sure the correct phrase was "hear hear" as opposed to the other variants I'd seen ("here here", "hear here", "here hear") but I'd never actually looked it up. So I decided to check popular internet usage using Google:

"hear hear" = 1,740,000 hits
"here here" = 3,880,000 hits
"hear here" = 307,000 hits
"here hear" = 334,000 hits

Well dang. According to popular usage twice as many people say "here here" than say "hear hear". But is that correct? Wikipedia says no:

Hear hear (Wikipedia):
...Hear, hear is an expression used as a short repeated form of hear ye and hear him. It represents a listener's agreement with the point being made by a speaker.

It was originally an imperative for directing attention to speakers, and has since been used, according to the Oxford English Dictionary, as "the regular form of cheering in the House of Commons", with many purposes depending on the intonation of its user. It is often incorrectly spelled "here here", especially on websites...

A quick double check of OneLook Dictionary Search confirms this. Six dictionaries list "hear hear" and only one lists "here here" (and that one happens to be the wiki article above.)

Popular usage drives the movement of meaning, though, so at some point in the future "here here" may end up being the correct phrase if we don't do something about it.

So if you want to avoid yet another English colloquialism that will have your great grandchildren scratching their heads and saying "WTF?" (or whatever kids will be saying in those days) then type "hear hear" at every opportunity.

Go on, say it, you know you want to.

Briaver and the Lynneaputians

Abacquer — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 21:29:00 -0400

So my friend Brian had an idea for a fun photo he wanted me to create for him. He wanted to be Gulliver of Gulliver's Travels, tied down on a beach by the Lilliputians... all of whom would be played by his wife Lynnea.

I originally wanted to shoot this on a beach (as per the original idea) but the lake in Chelmsford, MA that we were relaxing at didn't afford a beach with a suitable layout for the shot. So we instead did it on a nearby grassy knoll.

First we "bound" Bri by encircling him over and over with a thin twine. Then I helped him lie on a slightly raised knoll and lay flat before him so that the camera would be angled up to make him appear bigger. I said "imagine there is a six inch high person standing on your chest lecturing you" so that he would look in that direction. That was the first shot.

The subsequent shots all featured Lynnea using the thickest rope I could find on short notice as a prop. Bri would stand out of shot (typically on a footstool) and hold the rope while Lynnea would pull on it this way and that.

After recording about a dozen different poses, we did the lecturing pose, and then I shot the "sitting on the toes pose" when Lynnea was just relaxing on the stool. I thought the pose would come in useful and as you can see it did.

Shots were all done by daylight, no flash. EOS 5D with the EF 24-70mm 2.8L lens, which is the widest I own.

Then, after some cleanup in lightroom, came the hours of photoshop work to carefully clip Lynnea out of her surroundings in various pictures and edit her into this one at reduced scale. I thought the grass, which to a Lilliputian should be knee high at least, would be a problem, but it turned out that just using a gradient transparency on the ends of her legs (or whatever was closest to the ground) worked fine unless you look really close.

Things I would do differently if I shot this again:

I really need to get a chromakey backdrop for shoots like this. I shot Lynnea against a grassy green background, but that was not uniform enough to make clipping her out simple... it was fun, but it was a LOT of work.
Lynnea had been swimming prior to the shoot, and threw on a pair of pants for her poses. But in each subsequent pose water slowly seeped through the material and created spots in various places. I was mostly able to edit those out, but it was additional work.
Get thicker rope, or simply edit the rope out altogether and use the twine. The size difference between the reduced rope and the twine bugs me a little.
A beach location with a nice uniform ocean background would have made for easier editing.
I would have backed off a little more when shooting Bri. At 4x6, 6x9, or 8x12 the photo is fine, but at 8x10 the ends get clipped. That was just dumb on my part... to produce an unclipped 8x10 print some edits would be required.

All that said, I am really pleased with how the resulting image came out. And more importantly, my beloved friends Brian and Lynnea are happy with it, which is really what this was all about. Doing something nice for people I hold very dear in my heart.

Love you guys, glad you liked the photo!

Das Rad

Abacquer — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 19:46:00 -0400

Here's a funny animation I caught on Pharyngula, the excellent science blog by P.Z. Myers. The audio is German, but there are subtitles. I got a kick out of it, perhaps you will too?

Das Rad

Samantha's Big Day

Abacquer — Tue, 25 Dec 2007 00:20:00 -0500

Back in the ides of December my niece Samantha had a big day. She performed in a Christmas-themed dance recital with her dance troupe and then went home to have a birthday party. After the party she went back to the stage for an encore performance with her troupe. It was an important day for her and she was really keyed up, but did an excellent job during her numbers onstage. Way to go Sam!

My sister-in-law Kris, Sam's mom, asked me to come to the recital and party to take pictures. I packed some equipment up and made the long trip with equal shares of nerves and anticipation. During the trip down Kris phoned me and let me know that the director of the show wasn't keen on photographs being made. There could be no flash, and I could not stand close to the stage--she was concerned I would distract the dancers and block the views of the other patrons, which doesn't give me much credit but I could understand her concerns. More annoying was that I would not be able to use a tripod (so as not to be distracting).

So the tripod stayed in the car and my nerves got worse. How dark would it be? Would I be able to shoot anything decent at all? Would Kris be disappointed?

The answer to the first question was pitch black. The stage was lit dimly but the room was black as black could be. I went over my lens options and eventually settled on the EF 70-200mm f/2.8L IS. I had both the 35mm 1.4L and 85mm 1.2L with me, but I was nervous about confining myself to fixed focal lengths given the admonitions I had received--I didn't want to be moving around a lot. Fortunately I spotted a place to the side of the auditorium where I would be out of the aisle and not blocking anyone. I asked the person collecting tickets if I could stand there quietly and shoot and she said "I don't see why not."

So I cranked my ISO wayyy up (most shots at 1250 or 1600, a few at 1000) and took a boatload of shots. The angle was less than ideal. I really needed to be in the center aisle (and on a tripod!) Despite all this I managed to snag a few dozen really great shots (IMHO). Choosing the zoom was definitely the right idea... it gave me a lot of needed flexibility.

Afterward I got to meet the show's director and the first thing she said to me was "Was that you taking pictures out there with the flash?" I assured her that was someone else and pointed out there was no flash on the camera. Then I offered to get her copies of the pictures and she seemed agreeable.

Then the 70-200mm came off and the 85mm went on for portraits of Sam at the venue where the show was held. Then it was back to her house for her birthday party where I shot over a hundred pix of her and her friends, using both the 85mm and the 35mm primes.

During the following week in rare free moments, I post processed the photos heavily in lightroom and photoshop, and prepared a CD for both my sister in law, and the dance troupe director. The CDs included my business card and a text file discussing the shoot. Hopefully the dance theatre director will be pleased with the shots and decide to contract me for future work. That would be nice!! I did hear back that Kris *loved* the pictures, and that she gave her permission for me to share pictures of Sam on flickr, and on my business website (which very much bare and under construction), and that definitely warmed the cockles of my heart.

Sadly I don't have permission from the parents of the other kids at Sam's party, or the other dancers during her show, so I am limited to sharing just pictures of Samantha, but that's okay, in my eyes she really was the star of the day. I suspect if you check out the photos you'll agree. Click the image above to check out the photoset in my flickr photostream.

Happy 11'th birthday Sam, and bravo for a terrific show!

Who is the Plastered Dragon?

Abacquer — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 23:28:00 -0500

As I go from discussion forum to discussion form, I repeatedly get asked that question in some form or another. "What's 'Abacquer' mean?" or "What is a Plastered Dragon?" When that happens I get to tell a story that I've told many times. And each time I tell it I embellish it a little more than the last time. But writing it over and over again each time it happens is a bit silly. So I've decided to put the latest incarnation here so that I can just refer people to this article in the future. It will save me on typing. Good friends of mine already know this story and have already heard some of these jokes before. But if you are really curious, read on...

In a sort of story I wrote once (a D&D campaign really) there was a dragon who had a penchant for getting drunk.

As the story goes, many hundreds of years ago the residents of the little community of Wayside and many people from the surrounding towns and environs are gathered at the Wayside Inn for the annual Oktobrefest--a huge party which sees partygoers from all over their country--all manner of tradesman, adventurer, and race is sure to be there. And many get swilling drunk of course, particularly the gnomes (as is their custom) who prefer to drink more than anyone else (as is their custom) from a trough (as is their custom) and then beat each other senseless until they pass out (as is their custom).

So anyway as I said this party was going on one brisk Oktobre morn when all of a sudden this young bull drake appears in the sky, circles the town, and promptly lands right smack dab in the center of the town green. Nobody knew what to make of it. It was neither a metallic nor a chromatic dragon, so nobody was certain what its disposition would be, but it was also quite young as dragons go and would therefore be "easily" put down by the town guard if need be.

It turned out that need did not be, because the drake trotted to the trough of ale, stuck his head in, drank the whole thing in about 30 seconds flat, let out a loud burp and promptly passed out, to much admiration from the gnomes. The party continued about the sleeping beast unabated. Apparently the dragon was simply another partygoer, Wayside's first of that particular variety. And he quickly became the life of the party once he woke up and started dancing to the fine music provided by the local musicians. And apart from the inevitable property damage, his performance was well received.

It was the beginning of a long friendship, and as the years went by, the half-seas-over reptile would return each Oktobre to drink himself silly and make merry during Oktobrefest. He explained to the townspeople (in a rare sober moment) that his name was Abacquer (that's pronounced AB-bah-kur) and that his unusual coloration was due to his curious pedigree. His father was a benevolent copper dragon of some fame known as "Morrich the Claw". His mother was a chromatic dragon (specifically a white dragon) that had been raised as a foundling by copper dragons, who went by the moniker "Tiarrel the Rime". By his own admission, as a White/Copper hybrid, that made him a "Whopper Dragon", a fact that brought him much amusement and was sure to produce a beery guffaw from him whenever he brought it up. And given that his white dragon descent included a frost breath weapon, he could immediately chill your drink for you, so most people put up with hearing the story over and over, for his company was a good one, even if a bit sozzled.

Abacquer took a liking to Perronian Pink Champagne in particular, and the Wayside Inn began to stock up on it for his annual appearance. Once word of the inebriated dragon began to spread, the Oktobrefest became even more of an attraction that helped put Wayside on the map like never before. People would come from all over New Irth just to catch a glimpse of the "plastered dragon".

Upon reaching adulthood, Abacquer, like all dragons, chose a title for himself. He chose "Abacquer the Belch", much to the consternation of his parents, in recognition of his uncontested claim to the longest running belch in recorded history (12 minutes 48 seconds).

Later in life he made his aerie on Sherenpate Pyke and became something of a protector of the surrounding communities and vineyards. Especially the vineyards. Go figure. In his massive ice cavern he welcomed visitors and even had one visit of note from the musicians of a nearby farming village. A painting produced by a local artist hangs in the town's music hall commemmorating this event. In the painting the band is seated and playing in Abacquer's aerie while nervously glancing up at the (clearly intoxicated) dragon as he dances upside down on the ceiling. Of course white dragons can walk on any frozen surface seeming without regard for gravity, but as a half-white, Abacquer's icewalking ability was, according to him, "a little spotty". According to records of the event, the Belch informed the musicians that they needn't worry, his icewalking only gave out when he was drunk. Somehow that wasn't very reassuring, but the event went off without a hitch although all further concerts in his honor were held in town.

Eventually the fame of his story became so great that the Wayside Inn was renamed Inne of Ye Plastered Dragon (or simply, the Plastered Dragon Inn), and the rest is history. His life was long and colorful and he did many great deeds in spite of being a complete sot. He was knighted by the gnomes of Perro (there's a switch, as Abacquer once noted, being a knight and a dragon both meant that if he ever took a damsel hostage he would have to slay himself and then marry her, and not being the marrying sort, that was probably best.) And it is said that he is up for canonization in the gnomish pantheon, which is kind of a big deal. All previously canonized gnomish saints were bartenders and Abacquer has no talent for mixing drinks anywhere but in his belly. But the gnomes of Perro say (as is their custom) that he is "noseworthy", and I guess when it comes to binge drinking, nobody would be a better judge than they. And besides, being the biggest single consumer of Perronian Pink Champagne in all of New Irth (200 barrels a month) there's a certain economic interest among the gnomes of Perro in staying on his good side. But I digress... as is my custom.

I've always loved the Abacquer character, and so over the years, my online name has always been Plastered Dragon, or PDragon, or some variant thereof. And that's the story behind it--at some great length!

An Angry Letter About a Stupid Altercation

Abacquer — Mon, 30 Jul 2007 23:51:00 -0400

To whom it may concern:

My family and I visited your center on July 27, 2007. We had a nice time and enjoyed every part of our visit except for the end in your gift shop. Apart from the annoyance of it being blisteringly hot in the shop, we were accosted by an individual whose name I don't recall, but I'm sure, once you read this letter, you will know exactly who I am referring to.

Your shop was selling polished stones and magnetic stones "by the bag". The listed prices were $4 for a small bag of polished stones, $7 for a large bag of polished stones, and $5 for a bag of "sticky stones". There were no other signs posted indicating how many stones should be in a bag or any other special requirements. We had purchased some bags of stones just like these at the Polar Caves the day before where we were encouraged by the staff to "stuff the bag".

While I was sweating in the heat (it was 90 degrees outside) and selecting stones that might look good in my still life photographs, I was approached by an elderly gift shop employee who said to me "Just to let you know, you aren't allowed to overfill the bag, it has to close." My bag was not overflowing, but it was bulging because I was trying to pack it tightly. I took a few stones out of my bag and closed it. I was then informed that the bag must close "comfortably" and that if I tried to buy the bag as it was "they will catch you at the register". Given the heat (and the miserliness of your staff) I was running out of patience and said "I'll just pay a couple of extra dollars at the register if it is an issue."

I'd like to point out that having already spent well over $50 just to get my family into your center for the afternoon, and another $15 in the café for snack food, and being about to spend about $60 for gift shop items, I was offended that I was being hassled over a few pennies worth of rocks.

When I arrived at the register, the cashier was completely unfazed by my bags of stones and began ringing them up. Within seconds the same woman swooped in and informed the cashier that I could not purchase my bag of "sticky stones" because it was overfilled. I immediately said to the cashier "it's hot, I'm not going to go fill a second bag, please charge me two extra dollars." I could have easily closed the bag by removing only a few stones, but I figured that offering far more than the extra stones were worth should be good enough.

The cashier seemed to think that would be fine and repeated my offer to the officious employee. I was being more than generous, and yet, it wasn't good enough. I was informed I would have to buy a second bag of stones. So I set the bag aside and informed the cashier that I wouldn't be purchasing it today and made clear with my tone that I felt the entire exchange was patently ridiculous. At this point, the officious employee launched into a speech about how your center is a nonprofit organization, as if I needed that explained to me. I didn't appreciate the implication that I was somehow being greedy. I am an Audubon Society member, and I always donate when I visit wildlife sanctuaries even though as a society member I am not required to do so. Someone was being greedy that day, but it wasn't me, having sunk a total of about $125 into your coffers for a 3 hour visit.

I waved the obdurate woman away and reminded her that I had just offered to pay extra. Nonprofits don't turn away money when it is offered without strings, so this had nothing to do with your center's nonprofit status, and everything to do with someone who doesn't have enough important things to worry about. Nonprofits are typically very flexible, because flexibility equals greater donations and thus allows the nonprofit to do more for the greater good. I'm sure I don't have to explain that to you, but clearly you need to explain it to a certain intransigent member of your gift shop staff, because it cost you $7 during my visit, and since I was so insulted and angered, I don't really see myself or my family returning to your facility again, which means it probably is going to cost you quite a bit, considering that only minutes before my wife and I were talking about purchasing a membership.

The irritating woman left and the cashier apologized to me and made clear with her expression that she too felt the other employee was being unreasonable. At the very least, if you are going to sell items "by the bag" and are going to impose stringent restrictions on what a bag can contain, there has got to be a more sensible way to do it than to have an employee hovering over customers and pestering them. Like perhaps a sign that says "No More Than 12 Stones Per Bag" or an example bag with a sign saying "Your Bag Should Look Like This". Or simply sell the stones individually.

Though in the future I will certainly encourage folks to visit your facility, I'll be cautioning them about the gift shop. When folks visit such shops we know we are paying too much given the value of the goods, but we do it anyway because it is for a good cause. The last thing one should do in such a situation is harass the visitors and needle them for more money. I would have thought that was obvious.

Activate Your Geek Powers...

Abacquer — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 11:28:00 -0400

Okay my geeky friends, what's so funny about this?

Kittycats, Kittycats, 1, 2, 3...

Abacquer — Wed, 23 May 2007 18:15:00 -0400

This is what I saw in my upstairs bathroom window after pulling into the driveway and getting out of my car today:

Ever get the feeling someone was waiting for you to come home?

How Much Do We Do Without Thinking?

Abacquer — Mon, 21 May 2007 11:58:00 -0400

So the other day I was commenting on a blog where the authors were working on a new layout. I spotted some strange wrapping issues and uploaded a screenshot of my browser window for them to look at. Repeatedly, whenever the screenshot was on the screen, I caught myself trying to click the browser's back button in the screenshot. Needless to say, each time I did this was followed by a disjointed moment of confusion where I wondered why it wasn't working. Is my browser locked up? What's going on? After a second or so the realization would come. You dummy, that's not your browser, that's a picture of your browser.

I think it served as a reminder of how much we do automatically once we've "learned" to do it. The entire metaphor--hand to mouse, mouse to cursor, cursor to back button, click--all automatic and interpretted by the brain as "go back".

Anyway, next time I upload a screenshot of the browser, I think I'll leave the menu and toolbar out of it.

Sectarianism Lives

Abacquer — Sun, 20 May 2007 14:54:00 -0400

Here's a news story from my childhood hometown, reported by the Boston Globe. The First American Baptist Church of Whitman, MA has just ejected its pastor. This pastor came from a different Baptist church based in Holbrook that closed down in 2005, bringing his old congregation with him.

The problem, apparently, is that the First American Baptist Church is of the "American Baptist" sect, and the new pastor is not. He's an independent Baptist. The two groups don't appear to be mixing well, and there is mention of the pastor changing locks on the office doors and disallowing the former church clerk entry. And so the former clerk began a movement to oust the pastor, which has gained much support and ultimately succeeded.

...While [Reverend] Fernandez claimed the two congregations merged, Judge Frances McIntyre, in her ruling, said the two congregations remained virtually separate for the next year and a half.

"The issue here appears to be two fundamentally different religious groups competing for control of property which has historically belonged to one of the groups," McIntyre wrote...

..."He's a wonderful preacher. He's just not a believer in American Baptists," [former church clerk Jean] Porter said of Fernandez. "It's in our church constitution that this is an American Baptist Church. That's our denomination, and has been for over 100 years. He's an independent Baptist. It's as simple as that."...

I don't pretend to understand the differences between the two sects, but I think it a little sad that they can't get along well enough to share the same church. Then again at least one of the differences would have made me want to throw out the new pastor too:

...Eric Grey, associate executive minister for administration and finance for the American Baptist Churches of Massachusetts, said there are certain differences in the tenets among the Baptist sects. "One is that we affirm women in the ministry," he said. Grey said the American Baptist Churches of Massachusetts are "standing with the First Baptist Church of Whitman" in their court case against Fernandez...

(Emphasis mine.) Yeah, I can see where a new guy coming in and saying, "no more female ministers" might annoy people. (Then again, I don't think the Reverend did that.) According to the article Rev. Fernandez negotiated a move to the Whitman church on the agreement that he would become certified as an American Baptist, which he did not do. There is also mention of money being drained from a church account--all in all not a happy affair.

Perhaps the most annoying thing are the concluding remarks from the Reverend:

...Fernandez, meanwhile, said losing the Whitman building "doesn't matter" to him. "What is disappointing is the people who showed they were willing to sacrifice all these members of the congregation for a building."...

According to those who opposed him, it wasn't about "the building". It was about him failing to meet his end of an agreement to become certified by the American Baptist Churches of Massachusetts. It makes him seem just a little bit... sly--thinking perhaps that he would promise the certification, but then win over the congregation during Sunday services and not bother.

I don't highlight this story out of any "atheist superiority complex"--there are definitely different schools of thought among atheists, and not all of us get along. I mostly highlight the story because it is from my hometown, and because I'm sad these two groups couldn't work something out.

Mark Isaak's Index

Abacquer — Wed, 16 May 2007 09:58:00 -0400

Wow, I just stumbled across The Index to Creationist Claims by Mark Isaak. What a great resource!

Storms Rolling Through

Abacquer — Tue, 15 May 2007 23:40:00 -0400

It's approaching midnight and the patter of rain is filtering into my house, along with the drawn out, low, gut-vibrating rumble of thunder. An approaching storm is on the one hand exciting, but on the other hand serves as a reminder of just how powerless we all are. It's not hard to understand why primitive man would look at the angry sky and imagine a rampaging god.

I Can't Make This Stuff Up

Abacquer — Mon, 14 May 2007 06:00:00 -0400

Republican college students unite! Demand your right to a campus free of transgender bathrooms!

BSU takes heat for 'transgender bathroom' (The Oregonian):
..."We don't want the university to label this a transgender bathroom," said Jonathan Sawmiller, 22, a BSU student senator and president of the school's College Republicans. He raised the issue in an April radio broadcast on a Boise AM station. "Since the media got hold of it, the university was told to stop referring to it as a 'transgender bathroom,' and to start calling it 'unisex,' " he said.

Sawmiller, who in early 2007 confronted BSU President Bob Kustra with a complaint that the school invites mostly liberal speakers, has enlisted the assistance of the Idaho Values Alliance, a conservative Christian group.

"Our view is, gender is assigned at birth," said Bryan Fischer, the Idaho Values Alliance leader. "There's no third or fourth or fifth option."

Fischer wants to know whether student groups -- BSU's 200 campus organizations include Bisexuals, Gays, Lesbians and Allies for Diversity -- will be allowed to alert transgender individuals to the restroom in their literature...

These guys desperately need something important to worry about.

The Amazing Color Changing Card Trick

Abacquer — Sat, 05 May 2007 00:18:00 -0400

I found this awesome video via the equally awesome Bad Astronomy blog. I'm not big on card tricks, but this one is really amazing, and you might learn something from it as well.

Sony Needs a Dope Slap

Abacquer — Tue, 01 May 2007 09:08:00 -0400

I really need to add a "WTF" category to this blog. I had heard about this peripherally and figured it was just an urban legend, but it's not. In the last few days Sony released its new adult-oriented video game God of War II for the PlayStation console. Recently they had a big "European launch party" in Greece for members of the press who write about video game news. They tried to theme the party to match the nature of the game, so the party featured an actor dressed up as the hero from the game (okay, you might expect this), games involving throwing knives and pulling live snakes from pits (?), topless women who hand fed grapes to the guests (WTF?), and as a centerpiece, the decapitated carcass of a freshly slaughtered goat (WTF!!?).

Now it's not the first time Sony has done something amazingly stupid to promote their wares, but, as you can imagine not everyone was cool with a slaughtered animal being used as a "prop" at a party. Guests were invited to reach into the goat's lacerated body, pull out entrails, and eat them. The entrails had in fact been replaced with some sort of Greek dish that resembled intestines. Yum.

If a goat had been killed and served as a dish which guests could eat, that probably would have been fine... I mean anyone who eats meat is eating a killed animal. But to morbidly lay out a dead animal at your dinner party with its head hanging off as a lurid decoration? That's just disgusting, cruel, morbid, and a waste of an animal. According to Sony the goat carcass was purchased from a loal butcher and then returned to the butcher after the party.

Apparently it has finally occurred to Sony that this whole party really wasn't such a great idea. Mostly because of the backlash from animal rights groups, Sony has issued an apology.

From Sony Apologizes For Decapitated Goat In 'God Of War' Launch (InformationWeek via Yahoo! News):
..."On this occasion we recognize that we fell short of our normal high standards of conduct and apologize for any offense caused," Sony said in a statement. "We are conducting an internal inquiry into the circumstances of the event in order to learn from the occurrence and put in place measures to ensure that this does not happen again."...

The article goes on and quotes animal rights activists decrying the use of the goat's carcass, and a professor of marketing who calls the party centerpiece "stupid".

Which is all expected of course, but what I find intriguing is that nobody quoted seems to have any complaints about topless women feeding grapes to the partygoers. Okay, of course they are performers, and they were paid to perform this service, but it hardly seems appropriate for a video game launch party. The use of "pretty girls" at product launches or other types of retail expositions is not a new thing, and includes some sort of compensation, typically money, but not always. But this goes beyond anything I've heard of before. I would expect something like this at say a strip joint* or something like that, but a video game launch party for the press? WTF were they thinking?

Here's an article from 1Up.com recapping the event and including a picture which is probably NSFW.

That's effed up, yo.

*: Which is not to say I've ever been to a strip joint. For the curious, no I haven't. I have no interest in watching ecdysiasts perform live. That would be way too embarrassing for me.

Preoccupied

Abacquer — Mon, 30 Apr 2007 12:34:00 -0400

There's so much stuff going on in my life now I am very preoccupied. Today it hit home just how preoccupied I am. I got to work (late) and settled down to get going on this document I need to finish before I disappear next week for my oral surgery and recovery. But first I tossed my lunch in the microwave and started heating it up. Then I sat down an ate a plum that was in my lunchbag while I was working and lunch was cooking. The plum was delicious, according to the label on it, it was "Tree Ripened from Chile". I worked and ate, worked and ate. Finished the plum, tossed it away. Realized I was still quite hungry 20 minutes later and then remembered I needed to get my lunch from the kitchen. Someone had long since taken it out of the microwave but it was still warm. So I returned and dove back into my document, but couldn't shake the feeling that I had forgotten something.

About 10 minutes later I finally figured out what it was. I never took the label off the plum. Apparently, I ate it.

I'm a little preoccupied.

And apparently, tree ripened, from Chile as well.

With Virginia Tech Fresh in Our Memory

Abacquer — Fri, 27 Apr 2007 15:52:00 -0400

...So I had this dream last night where I went into a building, pulled out two P90s and started shooting everyone, then had sex with the dead bodies. Well, not really, but it would be funny if I did...

-- Allen Lee, Carly-Grove High School Student

Allen Lee wrote some seriously disturbed crap during a "Free Writing" assignment in his high school English class this week. Apparently the instructions on the assignment made clear that the students were not to censor themselves and should instead write whatever came to mind. The point was to keep writing and not to stop until the time ran out. Allen's essay begins "Blood sex and Booze. Drugs Drugs Drugs are fun. Stab, Stab, Stab, S…t…a…b…, poke." The end of the essay concludes with a message to his teacher: "No quarrel on you qualifications as a writer, but as a teacher, don't be surprised on inspiring the first cg shooting." The "cg" refers to "Carly-Grove", the name of Allen's school.

It is evident from his essay that he has an extremely low opinion of his teacher, and English in general. So I suppose it's possible he selected subject matter most calculated to upset the teacher. If so, the calculations were spot-on. Allen's teacher apparently called the police, and now he is charged with disorderly conduct according to the Chicago Tribune. You can read Allen's entire essay here.

I read the last sentence of Allen's essay as a threat, and therefore I am not at all surprised that some sort of discipline is in order, and I fail to see why Allen would be surprised. But apparently a lot of people are surprised because they seem to be leaping to his defense and claiming that the teacher/school are overreacting.

In the meantime Allen is planning to join the Marines.

The questions here are, are these the ravings of a deranged mind, or a normal high school student attempting to undertake a free writing assignment and making a poor choice of subject matter? Was arresting him an appropriate reaction or an overreaction?

What do you think?

PhoNETic

Abacquer — Fri, 27 Apr 2007 07:46:00 -0400

This is kind of cool. Punch a phone number into PhoNETic and it will try to find a word phrase or partial word phrase for your phone number based on the conversion of digits to letters on a standard pushbutton phone keypad. There wasn't anything good for mine, and even if there was I wouldn't post it because duh, then I'd be putting my phone number online! But it was a little fun to play with so, enjoy.

Good Grape, Bad Grape

Abacquer — Wed, 25 Apr 2007 08:25:00 -0400

As my teeth have declined recently, I've been switching to softer and softer foods (no more apples and ginger snaps... boo hoo). Grapes on the other hand can be reduced to mush with relatively little pressure so I can still consume them, and while not the healthiest of the fruity snacks, are still marginally better for you than say, spice drops. At least that's what I tell myself. I try to eat a banana every day too... lots of potassium and stuff.

Anyway, the thing with grapes is some of them come off the bunch looking pretty nasty, and sometimes I end up throwing away grapes that might still be good. The sorts of defects I've noticed are:

Raised whitish puffy areas, usually at the stem-end of the grape (overripe?)
Brownish bark-like scabs (healed injuries?)
Brownish discoloration under the surface in regions (bruises?)
Cracks in the skin that seem to have separated and pulled back (overripe?)
Bore holes in the surface, usually round and extending a few millimeters inside (eaten by an insect?)
Shriveling (grape is dead and drying out?)
Slime/fungus (yechhh!)
Portions have turned to brown mush (rotten)

For pretty much any of these defects I tend to toss a grape away. Although for the first three, if the affected area is very small or effected in only a slight manner, I may still eat the grape, possibly avoiding the affected area. But I don't know what really causes any of these things and possibly all of them are safe to eat (except maybe the slimey, fungus-covered variety). Does anyone else know?

It occurred to me I may be worrying too much. After all I eat raisins, and it's a fair bet that a grape with any but the last two defects probably shrivels up into a decent raisin where the defect would be much harder to detect. Therefore, I probably have in fact consumed many a raisin which came from a grape I would have discarded.

How do YOU tell a good grape from a bad grape?

Ovals of Annoyance

Abacquer — Sat, 14 Apr 2007 10:39:00 -0400

So I was driving along the other day and found myself behind a car with one of those ubiquitous oval bumper stickers. You've seen them, a white oval, typically containing 2 to 4 letters, these letters some kind of abbreviation or acronym for something important to the driver.

I hate these things. My world is already full to the brim with annoying three-letter acronyms and other symbols, it seems pointless to slap a code on the back of your car which is likely uninterprettable to the average person. Today I was behind "DOT"... whatever that means.

It is extremely rare that I am able to figure out what the oval means, and I usually drive alone so I have nobody to discuss it with. Some aren't that hard: the green-and-white VT, that's vermont; 26.2 is for marathon runners; etc. But most could mean anything at all. DOT? Department of Transportation? Drinks Only Tequila? Doubles-Only Tennis? Drives Off Track? Disciple of Terror? Dumb Oval Totem?

The oval bumper sticker concept comes from Europe. Originally the thing had a specific purpose, to show the country of origin. If you were from, say, Italy, you could put an oval on the bumper of your car with an internationally recognized abbreviation for Italy. Once here, the idea began to stretch and take on new meanings. Why not state of origin--as in MA or TX? Then popular vacation getaways started producing them (YNP for example, Yosemite National Park). Then they started to reflect hobbies or other interests (GEO for geocaching, or 26.2 as mentioned above). And now it has gotten to the point where you can order ovals that say anything at all, so you can have your own completely customized code on your bumper like say ULEV for Unbecoming Levity, or PDI for Plastered Dragon Inn.

But why bother if nobody is going to know what you mean? I mean yesterday I was behind a car that had an oval on the back with a big D in it. That's it, just a D. If it could mean just about anything, it might as well mean nothing. And since people can order them with anything they want printed on them, it's not like you can go online later and look them up to figure out what they mean, unless they are actually "Country of Origin" stickers, as originally intended. Closest thing I found to a lookup list was this. Interestingly they have DOT on this list, which they claim is a reference to Dorchester, Massachusetts.

Maybe I'm just being a curmudgeon, but I don't like them. If I was going to deface the back of my car, I'd order a series of custom stickers and place them in a line along the bumper like this:

20070413

Abacquer — Fri, 13 Apr 2007 15:33:00 -0400

Today is April 13, 2007... and a Friday. "Friday the thirteenth" usually brings a well-isn't-that-quaint smile to my face. Personally I don't believe in bad luck, but I find it interesting that the confluence of two separate beliefs (one that Fridays are bad luck, and two that 13 is bad luck) creates a heightened sense of misfortune on Fridays numbered 13.

Personally I love the number 13. It's a prime of course, and also a reversible prime, i.e. 13 is is prime and so is 31. Its multiples pop up in a number of interesting places. The english alphabet is 26 letters long, that's 2x13. There are 52 weeks in a year, that's 4x13. 52 playing cards in a standard deck, and so forth.

Today I read a story I hadn't heard before about Friday the 13'th on tridecaphobia.com, I can't vouch for its veracity though:

...The modern basis for the Friday the 13th superstition stems from Friday October the 13th, 1307. On this date, the Pope of the church in Rome in Conjunction with the King of France, carried out a secret death warrant against "the Knights Templar". The Templars were terminated as heretics, never again to hold the power that they had held for so long. There Grand Master, Jacques DeMolay, was arrested and before he was killed, was tortured and crucified. A Black Friday indeed!...

Interesting.

A Few Random Items

Abacquer — Fri, 16 Mar 2007 21:35:00 -0400

Continuing in the vein of yesterday's post, I have a few more random thoughts to share...

Survivorman
Perhaps you've never seen this show, it's on The Science Channel (not to be confused with Discovery Channel or The Learning Channel). I really enjoy it. The premise is simple. In each episode they take Les Stroud and dump him in the middle of nowhere with meagre supplies and about 50 pounds of camera equipment. His only mission is to survive for seven days before the crew returns to pick him up. He's not allowed to break down the camera equipment and use it for survival, and he does all the filming himself. I can only imagine what an incredible amount of effort is involved in shooting himself walking past the camera or trudging off into the distance, only to have to return and get the camera. This show strikes me as one James would enjoy. I've seen this poor guy dumped in the arctic tundra, the swamps of Georgia, some desert out west somewhere, even one episode where he had to survive in a life raft at sea for seven days. You can order season 1 of the show on DVD if you are interested. I discovered this show during my many days of bedrest over the last month or so.

North and West of the City...
I'm sick of this phrase. I hear it all the time during weather reports, as in "2 to 5 inches of snow are expected in the Boston area, while areas North and West of the city could receive as much as a foot." It's snowing today. Unlike those in and south of the city, there's no rain following the storm here... it's just piling up. Day before St. Patrick's day and the snow is just dumping down. *sigh*

Cosmos and Carl
I miss Carl Sagan, and I loved Cosmos when I was a kid. One of my best memories of childhood is sitting in the living room with my Dad watching Carl explain history, other dimensions, outer space, the doppler effect, and various other intriguing things. Pat and I both talked recently of trying to find the Cosmos series on DVD to watch with Lynnea (though it might be too slow paced for her.) Amazon has it, if you are interested. One of my favorite segments of that series was when Carl explained what it would be like for two dimensional creatures to encounter a three dimensional one, as a way of explaining what a fourth dimension might be like, as a mechanism for explaining the concept of a curved universe as it relates to the big bang. The two dimensional creatures were called "flatlanders" because they lived (appropriately enough) in Flatland. I finally found that segment on YouTube, but it is included in a larger 10 minute video. You can watch it here, the part about Flatland starts about 3 minutes in, after a discussion of Hubble's discovery that the universe was expanding. In the next segment, Carl ties in the curved universe and questions about the existence of God. It's slow paced but wonderfully done. I really should pick that series up and watch it again as an adult--I've no doubt I'd learn more this time.

Destroying a Career
As you probably know, Valerie Plame testified today before House Oversight and Government Reform Committee and finally had a chance to speak out on her cover being blown by an administration with hopelessly misplaced priorities. One of the saddest things about this, as far as I can see, is that her CIA career as a covert agent is basically over at this point. That's got to be infuriating for her. I can't imagine what that must be like. From her testimony today:

..."My name and identity were carelessly and recklessly abused by senior officials in the White House and State Department. [...] I could no longer perform the work for which I had been highly trained." [...] Under questioning, Plame recounted feeling "like I had been hit in the gut" on the July 2003 morning when she saw a newspaper story by syndicated columnist Robert Novak identifying her...

Pace and the Unbagged Cat
Smooth one General, really smooth. For those of you who haven't heard, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, General Peter Pace, stepped in it on Tuesday by saying he supported the Pentagon's ban on gays serving openly in the military because homosexual acts are "immoral". Way to go, dickhead. There are thousands upon thousands of gay people serving in our great nation's military right now, many of them putting themselves in harm's way. Thanks for telling them that they're a bunch of immoral perverts. General Pace, for his part, has refused to apologize for the remarks, and has only gone as far as to say that he regrets making them. I'll bet he does, but only because it is inconvenient for him now that the cat is out of the bag. As far as offending the gay troops who've been valiantly serving over the last four years of this misguided war? It's clear what Pace thinks of them. I never understood the ban on gays in the military, and I understood don't-ask-don't-tell even less, except that it allows good soldiers to serve a country that needs them, regardless of their sexual orientation. And the same people that screeched in 1993 that we couldn't let gays in are screeching today that we can't let gays serve openly, for the same stupid reasons--because it would cause a breakdown in unit cohesion on the battlefield. What a bunch of bullshit. I'm sorry but a guy brave enough to crawl across a battlefield under fire while trying to avoid landmines isn't going to be worrying if the guy behind him is checking out his ass. Give me a goddamned break, PLEASE. Here's a thought, I won't ask then next time something as stupid as that enters your mind, and you don't tell, okay? (As a sad but not unexpected sidenote, conservatives are leaping to the General's defense.)

Weelanders Show How Evolution Leads to Extinction

Abacquer — Sun, 18 Feb 2007 22:12:00 -0500

Okay this is going to be a lengthy article with a lot of graphics, so I am going to use an excerpt today. Basically it's a summary of the first run of my Genetic Factoring sim, and how it demonstrates that evolution can lead to extinction. It also includes a summary of the most efficient (and robust) genome to be generated by random mutation and natural selection, and how it compares to the original genome. Let's begin with a graph...

Genetic Factoring -- Weelanders Run Amok

Abacquer — Sun, 18 Feb 2007 10:00:00 -0500

I'm sure you remember the Weelanders... artificial life forms which lived on a grid and helped demonstrate that evolution through random mutation causes natural selection to kick in something fierce. At the time I originally ran tests with the Weelanders, I hypothesized that the Weelander concept could be adapted to do more than just demonstrate natural selection.

And, a few months ago, I did just that. I built a new version of the Genome application called "GeneticFactoring", and stripped out a ton of Weelander support code. I wanted to make Weelanders that factored numbers and then reproduced based on how successful they were at factoring. As a result they didn't need to search for and consume food, they didn't need sexual reproduction, they didn't need the ability to move, heck they didn't need chromosomes in pairs, as a result, all of the "critter emulation" code was unnecessary, resulting in a simpler Weelander support system.

What they did need was the ability to compute square roots, find primes, and factor numbers... this was the new code that needed to be added, and it was all going to be written in the native Weelander instruction set. It took me awhile to code the genome "Facto-f", but eventually I had it working. Then I modified the container and world code to invoke the Weelander factoring code in the following manner:

Populate: at the beginning of time, populate the grid so that it is completely full of the starting Weelander genome "f".
Setup: build a list of 50 numbers to factor, then factor each number using internal container code and store the results.
Execute:
1. for each critter on the grid
2. run through the 50 numbers
3. call the Weelander's Execute method and pass it the number to factor.
4. The Weelander factors the number and returns the results.
5. If the Weelander goes into an infinite loop without returning results, terminate it.
6. Otherwise, compare the Weelander's results to the original results.
7. If they do not match, terminate the Weelander for inaccuracy.
8. If they do match, note how many execution steps the Weelander needed to compute the result, and proceed to the next number.
9. Once all the numbers have been factored, compute an efficiency value for this critter (total number of steps divided by total number of tests).
10. Proceed to the next critter and repeat.
Cull: examine all the living critters on the grid and gather the top ten percent based on efficiency, and terminate all the others.
Repopulate: for the most efficient critters, allow each one to reproduce asexually (possibly with mutation). If after processing them all, the grid is not filled, go back and run through them again. Keep doing this until the grid is filled.
Loop: Jump to step 3.

An immediate problem which cropped up was that Weelanders would mutate in ways that made them faster at factoring this specific set of test numbers. So if by random chance, none of the test numbers was a multiple of say, 7, the Weelanders might make themselves faster by throwing away the "divide by 7" test somehow. Which is great until you hand them a multiple of 7 at which point they die from inaccuracy.

I solved this problem somewhat by changing step 6 to jump to step 2 instead of 3. Thus on each "tick" of the world, a new set of test numbers would be created and then all the Weelanders would be tested against that set. Makes sense really, and automatically weeds out Weelanders that made the grade last tick by "cheating". I improved this further by making the first 10 test numbers a fixed set that didn't change and which exercised a lot of the conditions I wanted to make sure were covered. The remaining 40 were random.

But another problem appeared, one that completely flummoxed me because the system appeared to drift toward less efficient creatures over time, instead of more efficient ones. How could that be possible? Natural selection should continue to hold true, and the creatures should be *more* efficient over time, not less efficient.

But nothing prepared me for the worst problem at all... hardware. My computer, wonderful though it is, is experiencing a hardware problem. The cooling system is no longer operating, or not operating well. As a result, any operation that pins the CPU usage at 100% for a period longer than 10 minutes or so will cause an audible heat warning alarm to begin issuing. It's an alternating two-tone klaxon which doesn't come from the computer speakers, it comes from somewhere inside the computer case. And it is, needless to say, very alarming. I like my CPU. I don't want to cook it.

Needless to say factoring numbers is CPU/FPU intensive. And I've got 230 Weelanders factoring 50 numbers each, over and over, ad infinitum. After 10 minutes or so of runtime, the CPU gets too hot, and I have to shut the simulation down or risk damaging my computer. This problem cropped up immediately after building the new GeneticFactoring code and caused me to terminate the experiment permanently months ago.

Then last night I broke the code out again and tried to figure out a way to get it to execute without pan-searing my CPU. Eventually I came up with a rather simple solution. The simulation executes for 20 ticks, pinning the CPU at 100% for about 60-90 seconds. Then the simulation pauses, basically issuing a call to Thread.sleep for sixty seconds of downtime. This drops CPU consumption to 0% or close to 0% for a minute, giving the CPU a chance to cool. Resulting in a usage pattern like this:

I'm happy to say that having made this change I've been running the simulation for 3 hours with no overheat alarms. At this point I feel safe walking away from the computer and letting it process the simulation.

Regarding the other problem, the problem of the population drifting toward inefficiency, I also managed to solve that. I observed the changes to the Weelander genome over time. After awhile I began to observe what I thought was the culprit. Creatures weren't being selected based on their efficiency at factoring *all* numbers, just the 50 test numbers they had to factor.

So let's say a mutant does something weird like tests factors out of order... instead of 2, 3, 5, 7, 11 it goes 5, 3, 2, 7, 11. It's still accurate, but it tests a different factor first. If more of the numbers in the test set are multiples of 5 than 3, and more are multiples of 3 than 2, then this critter will in the end rate more efficient than the basic Facto-f genome, which is suitable for factoring any value. As a result, genomes which aren't really more efficient at factoring any value, get selected ahead of the f genome, and over time, this exterminates the f genome. After which the population becomes less efficient over time as more and more test sets are produced.

That was my hypothesis anyway. To solve the problem, I decided to artificially inject the original genome into the list of critters during the repopulate stage, thus if the population ever drifted away from efficiency, there would always be some number of the original genome to tug it back. Basically I grab my ten percent most efficient, and then tack 10 copies of the original genome to that list before I repopulate. This makes sense since natural selection is only concerned about the environment you are in (i.e. the 50 numbers you happened to test) as opposed to my overall goal (more efficient factoring of ANY number.) Now the top ten percent must always compete with the baseline. If they drift away, the baseline will win and it will get selected for repopulation instead. The only way to stay alive is to consistently beat the baseline.

Makes sense doesn't it? Yes, yes, I know, brilliant.

It was right about that time I noticed that the code that was selecting genomes for propagation was selecting the least efficient ones instead of the most efficient ones. Y'know, it takes a special kind of mind to come up with a brilliant explanation like the one above and still be completely wrong. Needless to say selecting the least efficient members of the population will uh, tend to make the population drift toward inefficiency. It's amazing what happens to the code when you say "greater than" but you meant to say "less than". > versus <, baby... classic coding error.

Nonetheless, although the effect I hypothesized was ultimately not to blame for the drift, I still think the effect could occur, so I decided to keep the "baseline infusion" code in place.

So the factoring Weelanders are back in action, and I'm interested to see what they will do to become more efficient at factoring. There are a lot of simple things I can think of that would lead to slightly more efficient code, but the Weelanders are always surprising me.

What I can tell you is that given a test sample, the Facto-f genome generally requires (on average) 1500 to 2200 execution steps per number. After running the simulation for 3 hours, the top genomes are showing efficiencies on the order of 500 to 600 execution steps per number. Ok I'm impressed. Especially when you consider that these Weelanders have to produce accurate results to survive. If they fail any single factoring test, they're gone.

I'm going to let the sim run for awhile longer and then take a peek at these efficient Weelanders. I wonder what they are doing?

Have Horn, Will Annoy

Abacquer — Thu, 08 Feb 2007 10:15:00 -0500

My patience with whoever the hell is picking up people across the street is rapidly approaching its end. They typically have someone come by between 6 AM and 6:30 AM, and upon arrival the driver will lay on the horn a few times... right on the street below my bedroom window. 6 AM, I kid you not. I can't even begin to describe how rude it is to honk an automobile horn repeatedly on the street in a residential area at 6 AM.

And of course, if the person being picked up isn't ready, (and, um, they NEVER are), the honking begins again. Without fail this awakens me. Every day. From a sound sleep. One time I looked out the window and saw the driver chatting on her cellphone while laying on the horn. Here's a thought, you obnoxious ass, hang up and call whoever the hell it is you are supposed to be picking up!!!

Today it happened twice. Once at 6:30 AM, and then again at 9:30 AM. Both times I was trying to sleep. The second time it was a different driver in a big 4x4-type vehicle. He laid on that horn for 8 solid long blasts when he was sitting a mere ten feet from my neighbor's door. I staggered down to my front door, wrenched it open and shot him a pissed-off look before slamming it shut again. Ten feet from the door on a beautiful sunny morning. Jesus! Drag your ass out of the car and ring the effing doorbell!

There's a whole group of people just drifting through life doing stuff and never even considering how their actions will impact other people. I just dont understand that at all.

Tree Removal Pictures Are Up

Abacquer — Sat, 27 Jan 2007 14:12:00 -0500

Click here to check 'em out.

I Know My Nuts Better Than I Used To

Abacquer — Fri, 26 Jan 2007 13:17:00 -0500

Why is everyone running away screaming? No I'm not going to write about those nuts! Sheesh!

Sometimes you want a snack (I said this wasn't about those nuts, so get your minds out of the gutter) but alas, there just isn't anything in the house you want to nibble on, because you haven't made a grocery run lately, and you don't feel like cooking up something just for snacking on.

Times like that some folks (at least me) will eat something that we might otherwise have given a miss... the end-of-the-loaf-of-bread that nobody wants smeared with peanut butter, that half full box of Harvest Crisps that has been in the pantry for like a millenium because nobody in the family likes them, a handful of chocolate chips, you get the idea.

So a couple weeks ago I was in that circumstance and the only thing I could lay my hands on was a half-eaten canister of generic-brand mixed nuts. I would hasten to add, that a can of mixed nuts is among the last things I would choose to eat given my druthers, but that's what there was. And (at least in my house) half eaten nuts means one thing and one thing only--no cashews. Because AFAIC cashews are the only thing worth eating in a can of mixed nuts, and the fam agrees for the most part. When you first open a can of mixed nuts, there's that delicious nutty aroma, and a pleasant few minutes of picking out and eating the cashews.

Then you shake the can, and pick out more cashews. And each time you do, the can requires more shaking to find the cashews until such point as there are no cashews, or so few, that you are just shaking the can over and over again and not actually nibbling on anything. At which point you either resign yourself and eat a few peanuts (which are basically packing material for the cashews), or you just put the can back in the pantry.

I don't really like nuts much at all. Cashews are okay I guess but I prefer no nuts. I don't like cookies, or chocolate, or brownies with nuts. And if I could still eat ice cream, I wouldn't want any nuts in that. The nuts I have actually eaten are: cashews (which aren't really nuts), pistachios (mmm), peanuts (boring), almonds (blandtastic), pine nuts (meh), and walnuts (blechh). There is a special place of loathing in my bowels for walnuts, I'd rather crunch balsa wood.

So I have this nut aversion. Which explains why this (half-eaten) can of nuts was not a very enticing proposition, but at least I could choke down the peanuts, and I was hungry enough so it would have to do. According to the can it contained peanuts, cashews, almonds, brazil nuts, filberts, and pecans. So I decided, screw it, I would try them all... I've avoided pecans, filberts, and brazil nuts for like, ever, and maybe I would like them if I tried them?

But first the almonds... I've only ever had these in chocolate... never by themselves. They are every bit as bland alone as they are in chocolate...

Next the Brazil Nut. Brazil nuts are HUGE. Sometimes you see these in Christmas platters with their scary dark brown shells still on, looking like thumb-size cocoons ready to pop open and release a fat unsightly grub. Without their shell they look a lot less scary, but still dauntingly large, especially if you are not enamoured of nuts, like me. I found eating the brazil nut to be a chore, and the taste to be utterly bland. As bland as the almond. If the nut were unsalted I think I'd have tasted nothing at all. No points for the brazil nut I'm afraid.

Then the Filbert. Sayyyy... these are delicious! These are what hide inside those shells that look like pointy acorns on those Christmas platters of nuts that were so ubiquitous at family gatherings of my childhood. They are otherwise known as hazel nuts, and they are quite tasty. I think once you're done shaking the can and picking out the cashews, it's definitely worth it to shake it again and pick out the filberts. Nummy!

Finally the Pecan. I saved the pecan for last because the weird shape of the nut-meat reminds me of the shape of walnut-meat... which led me to believe they probably taste like walnuts. Holy cow was I wrong! Pecans are delicious... way better than walnuts, almonds, or even the filberts.

So at nearly 40 years of age, I've finally gotten to know my nuts. And you know? They're not all that bad after all.

Nut pictures from The Nut Factory, a source for nuts and other snacks.

Holy Moly! It's C-C-C-Cold!

Abacquer — Fri, 26 Jan 2007 10:18:00 -0500

Stay indoors please, the coldmeister is on a rampage. Wind chill temps reported this morning were -17°F in Fitchburg, and -21°F in Worcester. ::everyone who uses Farenheit goes BRRR!:: For you Celsius types, that's -27°C and -29°C. ::everyone else goes BRRR!::

I'm sorry I didn't write anything all week. Work has been alternatively crazy and dead (my project is in it's final throes, where I am officially off the project, but as last-minute issues are found, I get pulled back in.) At present there is no new project to put me on so I am on the bench. Which is sometimes good and bad.

On Wednesday for example I had a whole bunch of things I wanted to write about. I had my downed trees removed, some politicial issues had me pissed off, I had some xbox games I wanted to post reviews for, some new Indie music to talk about, some movies to talk about, and some other random items. I was completely unassigned at work so I figured that I would write a bunch of things.

But I barely had my desk cleaned off when I got one of those emergency calls and I was sucked back in. When I was finally freed up again, I simply was in no mood to write. Everything I had wanted to talk about seemed unimportant and all I wanted to do was relax.

Blogging doesn't relax me, apparently.

Then on Thursday my kid woke up sick and so I've been looking after her between handling issues for work and working out of the house.

Anyway, I hope things will settle down soon, and I apologize to anyone who was disappointed that I hadn't added anything. My good friends have been busy on their blogs, so I invite you to peruse my blogroll at left and read examples of interesting content, rather than my rambling pointless blather.

Best thing I read all week was an article by an atheist mother on the wonderful blog Atheist in a Mini Van. Her daughter was annoyed by a teacher who gave her class a ten-minute "pop essay" assignment. The assignment was "What do you want for Christmas?"

Why would she be annoyed? Well duh, not everyone celebrates Christmas, and it's presumptuous of the teacher to just ask all the students in the class (including the Muslims, Jews, and atheists) to write about what they want for the teacher's religious holiday.

So that is what this young girl wrote about, that and her own atheist leanings, and the sad state of the poor. It was a wonderful essay, remarkable for the kid's age, and I encourage you to read it. Needless to say, a number of wacko fundies have commented on the article to communicate their Christian love for the atheist Mom and her daughter, by telling them they are going to Hell and whatnot. Assholes, the lot of them.

The teacher is definitely a mixed bag. She had the sensitivity at least to recognize that this young lady is observant and talented, and gave her an A+ on the essay. On the other hand, though, after class she told the girl that she couldn't possibly be an atheist because the ability to care for other people's feelings was not an atheist trait, but instead was a Christian attitude. So the teacher's both presumptuous and ignorant. Not an atheist trait... what a nitwit.

Giant Banana in the Texas Sky

Abacquer — Mon, 01 Jan 2007 17:54:00 -0500

I don't even know where to file this one. It's a serious WTF? thing. Have you wanted someone to build a giant geostationary banana that would drift around in the Texas sky for about a month? Well your wishes can come true if you are willing to chip in a buck for the Geostationary Banana Over Texas project...